Skip to main content

Gas Prices according to Virgil

The latest increase in the price of petrol sparked a memory of a conversation I had with an older gentleman many years ago. Let's call him "Virgil".

As people go, he was lovely old soul, but more than a little naive and more than a little sheltered.

He'd only been out of Perth county once... when a time share company sent him a mailer stating that he'd been one of a lucky few selected to receive a chance to win a trip to Hawaii (if he came in to hear a presentation in Toronto.) He was convinced he'd won the trip and nothing would convince him otherwise.

Of course there was also the time he bought a $5000.00 air filtration system for his rented farmhouse over the phone.

His life "savings" consisted of a large old trunk filled with loose change*.

He also used to buy Kraft Dinner (but only when it was on sale) and then throw out the cheese packets (he didn't like the cheese).

But those are all stories for another day.

Anyway, one day I was giving Virgil a ride home and as we passed a gas station, he remarked on the increase of the price of gas. I should mention here that Virgil had three teeth and spoke in mumbles. The following conversation is the best I can figure as to what he said.

Virgil: My oh my. Look at 'dem prices. Dat's criminal dat is. Yer see, if dey want people to buy more gas, dey should lower dem prices or have a sale.

Me: Well Virgil, as I see it, the prices of petroleum products are only going to increase...

I then when on to explain in detail how supply and demand worked, and that ultimately as the world's demand for petrol increased and the available resources dwindled, the prices were only likely to increase. His answer has forever haunted me.

Virgil: Oh dey'll never run out er gas. Dey just opened up another well the other day.

*Guess who had to help roll it and cart it to the bank when Virgil died. When I was younger and remarked on the uselessness of pennies, my dad would say "I wish I had a million of them". A million pennies is $10,000... that's 20,000 roles. And from experience I can tell you with complete certainty... you most certainly do not want a million pennies, particularly if you have to role them and cart them to the bank. $500 dollars in pennies was sufficient to convince me of that. 

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Free Software for Some, Empty Wallets for Others

As an IT professional (and a cheap bastard), it infuriates me when I see people being roped and lured into spending hard on cash on expensive software solutions when there are a multitude of open source, free alternatives readily available on the internet. Stop throwing your money at greedy corporate executives who certainly don't need yet another fancy chess set (that they don't even know how to use) carved out of some endangered species or another ocean going yacht to add to their fleet. Why spend hundreds of dollars when you can pay nothing at all (most of these software projects accept donations, which I would strongly encourage). You'll feel a lot better donating ten bucks for some fabulous software and keeping the free software revolution going, than lining the pockets of the above mentioned corporate goons. Here's some stuff you'll find useful at home: Gimp : A flexible and comprehensive alternative to throwing hundreds of dollars away for Adobe Photosh...

Christmas Shopping for the Smart

I recently completed my annual July Christmas shopping and a friend noticed the large amount of shopping bags coming out of my car. He casually inquired what it was all for and when I remarked, it was for Christmas, he looked rather puzzled and asked "why now?" Why now indeed? Let's face it, Christmas shopping is an incredible pain in the ass at the best of times... unless you do it in July like the smart, organized people. Let's look at the many benefits of completing the task, six months ahead of schedule. 1. Shopping in shorts, sandals and a t-shirt is a hell of a lot easier than shopping in several layers of clothes, heavy boots, scarves, woolly hat, and heavy fur lined coat. Sure, just like wearing all that crazy winter survival getup, you may get a little warm and uncomfortable lugging all those bags around, but the difference is that I can buy a cool drink, sit out in the shade and relax outside. Relaxing and taking off all that gear just isn't possi...

I got nuthin'

Recently I have received a number of compliments for my blog.  I certainly can't take all the credit... I have to give a special "thank-you" to all the flaming morons I'm surrounded by for supplying me with quality material to complain about. That said, there are unfortunately long periods where I don't post anything because I run low on anecdotes because the morons just aren't being entertaining enough... that or I may be otherwise distracted with my current Minecraft (or Mindcrack as I call it) addiction.   I have considered engineering situations wherein the morons would create some interesting anecdotes, but unfortunately most of these would likely result in a lawsuit and/or jail time. So, in future during the dry periods I will be posting a series of cartoons drawn several years ago by myself and a friend of mine. I don't claim to be the best artist or for the material to be entirely original (it's a little derivative of the Far Sid...