As anyone with a young child knows, talking with toddlers can be (and usually is) and endless source of amusement. They have a very unique view of the universe.
Now that Iona has started really developing the art of conversation, I find myself taking note of some of the more outstanding examples. The following are compiled from the last few months:
On Star Wars:
We recently watched the original trilogy in full. Perhaps I should be concerned that she shouts "Yay!" every time Darth Vader enters the scene, or that when she see's stormtroopers, she shouts "Pew! Pew!".
In any event, she clearly enjoyed the movies.
Me: Iona, what was your favourite part of Return of the Jedi?
Iona: The Emperor! Bwahahahaa.
Me: Did you like the Ewoks?
Iona: More Taun-Tauns!
Me: Yes, Jedi definitely suffered from a lack of Taun-Tauns.
On another Star Wars related note, Iona is not scared of Wampas or Rancors in the slightest. Large auditoriums with strange people freak her out however. Clever girl.
On watching the Beatles 1 video collection:
Iona: She Loves you, Yeah, Yeah, Yeah!
Me: You like the Beatles I take it.
Iona: More Pooh.
Me: You want to watch Winnie the Pooh instead?
Iona: No, more Pooh!
Me: Oh, you want the Beatles to sing the Winnie the Pooh song?
Iona: Yeah!
Me: Sorry sweetie, the Beatles haven't taken requests in about fifty years.
Iona: (Does an eerily accurate impression of Winston Churchill scowling)
She likes to sing many other Beatles songs. I love her renditions of of "Yellowlalaleen" and "Hey Joow" which sounds only mildly anti-semetic.
Iona; Ringo - he plays drums good.
Me: He certainly does.
Iona: I play drums good too.
Me: You could use a little more practice. Take notice how Ringo isn't bashing the drums recklessly, frightening the other Beatles with his frantic movements? He also isn't deliberately throwing his sticks at anyone, nor does he insist on playing them at 7:30am.
On her day at daycare:
Me: Did you have a good day?
Iona: Um, yep. I play Liam.
Me: What did you have for lunch?
Iona: Soup! Not too hot!
She says this everyday. Even when her shirt is clearly stained with pizza or there's noodles in her shorts.
On driving her little toy car:
Iona: (While making a honking sound) Stupid! Stupid! Go dogs go! The light is green now!!!
Me: Yes, the people in front of us are rather slow.
Iona: Are they frustrating you, Daddy?
Me: Yes, very much so.
Clearly I need to watch my language when driving her about.
On Daddy's hairy arms:
Iona; You have fur.
Me: Yes, I have hair.
Iona: The fur on your arms go all way up.
Me: Yes. Yes it does.
Iona: It like a Wookie.
Thanks.
On cleaning:
Iona: No Daddy! I mop!
Me: Sure!
I wish I could take advantage of this more, but unfortunately, she misses a lot of spots.
On playtime:
Iona: I make cupcakes.
Me: Mmmm. Yummy.
Iona: No! Don't eat my imaginary cupcakes!
Iona: Daddy, you can be Elsa. (The Queen in the movie Frozen, which just about every toddler under the age of four is addicted to.)
Me: How about I be the Emperor instead? "Now witness the firepower of this fully armed an operational battle station... bwaahahahaa!"
Iona: NO! Elsa not say that! You be Elsa!!!
Me: Why are all your little guys in jail?
Iona: They were bad.
Me: I see you're not terribly concerned with overcrowding.
Iona: Can we put more in?
Me: Are you familiar with the Black Hole of Calcutta?
Iona: Boba Fett will get more guys.
While I applaud her creativity in improvising a jail out of an old Fischer Price train car, sometimes my daughter scares me.
On Dancing:
Iona: Daddy, you not dance.
Me: Why not?
Iona: Because daddy, you're a bad dancer.
Me: The story of my life.
On the cats;
Iona: That Charlie. He's old and nice, but he has a dirty bum.
Me: That's right. Very observant of you.
Iona: That Mattie. She's soft, but she talks to much.
Me: Also very accurate.
On Singing:
Iona: Give it to me baby! Uh-huh, uh-huh.
Me: Iona, not so loud! We're at the mall.
Iona: (Shouting) Give it to me baby! UH-HUH, UH-HUH!
Thankfully, everyone found that amusing. Clearly I need to watch our musical choices in the car.
Now that Iona has started really developing the art of conversation, I find myself taking note of some of the more outstanding examples. The following are compiled from the last few months:
On Star Wars:
We recently watched the original trilogy in full. Perhaps I should be concerned that she shouts "Yay!" every time Darth Vader enters the scene, or that when she see's stormtroopers, she shouts "Pew! Pew!".
In any event, she clearly enjoyed the movies.
Me: Iona, what was your favourite part of Return of the Jedi?
Iona: The Emperor! Bwahahahaa.
Me: Did you like the Ewoks?
Iona: More Taun-Tauns!
Me: Yes, Jedi definitely suffered from a lack of Taun-Tauns.
On another Star Wars related note, Iona is not scared of Wampas or Rancors in the slightest. Large auditoriums with strange people freak her out however. Clever girl.
On watching the Beatles 1 video collection:
Iona: She Loves you, Yeah, Yeah, Yeah!
Me: You like the Beatles I take it.
Iona: More Pooh.
Me: You want to watch Winnie the Pooh instead?
Iona: No, more Pooh!
Me: Oh, you want the Beatles to sing the Winnie the Pooh song?
Iona: Yeah!
Me: Sorry sweetie, the Beatles haven't taken requests in about fifty years.
Iona: (Does an eerily accurate impression of Winston Churchill scowling)
She likes to sing many other Beatles songs. I love her renditions of of "Yellowlalaleen" and "Hey Joow" which sounds only mildly anti-semetic.
Iona; Ringo - he plays drums good.
Me: He certainly does.
Iona: I play drums good too.
Me: You could use a little more practice. Take notice how Ringo isn't bashing the drums recklessly, frightening the other Beatles with his frantic movements? He also isn't deliberately throwing his sticks at anyone, nor does he insist on playing them at 7:30am.
On her day at daycare:
Me: Did you have a good day?
Iona: Um, yep. I play Liam.
Me: What did you have for lunch?
Iona: Soup! Not too hot!
She says this everyday. Even when her shirt is clearly stained with pizza or there's noodles in her shorts.
On driving her little toy car:
Iona: (While making a honking sound) Stupid! Stupid! Go dogs go! The light is green now!!!
Me: Yes, the people in front of us are rather slow.
Iona: Are they frustrating you, Daddy?
Me: Yes, very much so.
Clearly I need to watch my language when driving her about.
On Daddy's hairy arms:
Iona; You have fur.
Me: Yes, I have hair.
Iona: The fur on your arms go all way up.
Me: Yes. Yes it does.
Iona: It like a Wookie.
Thanks.
On cleaning:
Iona: No Daddy! I mop!
Me: Sure!
I wish I could take advantage of this more, but unfortunately, she misses a lot of spots.
On playtime:
Iona: I make cupcakes.
Me: Mmmm. Yummy.
Iona: No! Don't eat my imaginary cupcakes!
Iona: Daddy, you can be Elsa. (The Queen in the movie Frozen, which just about every toddler under the age of four is addicted to.)
Me: How about I be the Emperor instead? "Now witness the firepower of this fully armed an operational battle station... bwaahahahaa!"
Iona: NO! Elsa not say that! You be Elsa!!!
Me: Why are all your little guys in jail?
Iona: They were bad.
Me: I see you're not terribly concerned with overcrowding.
Iona: Can we put more in?
Me: Are you familiar with the Black Hole of Calcutta?
Iona: Boba Fett will get more guys.
While I applaud her creativity in improvising a jail out of an old Fischer Price train car, sometimes my daughter scares me.
On Dancing:
Iona: Daddy, you not dance.
Me: Why not?
Iona: Because daddy, you're a bad dancer.
Me: The story of my life.
On the cats;
Iona: That Charlie. He's old and nice, but he has a dirty bum.
Me: That's right. Very observant of you.
Iona: That Mattie. She's soft, but she talks to much.
Me: Also very accurate.
On Singing:
Iona: Give it to me baby! Uh-huh, uh-huh.
Me: Iona, not so loud! We're at the mall.
Iona: (Shouting) Give it to me baby! UH-HUH, UH-HUH!
Thankfully, everyone found that amusing. Clearly I need to watch our musical choices in the car.
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