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Of Plastic Bags and Magic Nose Goblins

This past year I've dedicated a lot of time to complaining about the kind of idiots who are generally too stupid to find their way out of a paper bag with a map and a pair of scissors.

This year, I think we all owe it to them to help these idiots help themselves.

Let's replace the paper bag with a plastic bag... and not one of the sissy plastic bags we have these days; I'm talking about the industrial strength kind we had in the 80's.

And lets tie the ends closed.

And dump it in a lake.

Even if they don't figure out how to remove their fingers from their noses and start addressing the main problem at hand (there's no incentive like last minute panic), they should at least generate some amusement.

I'm speaking figuratively of course. What I'm saying is we should do our utmost to allow these troglodytes to hang themselves with their own stupidity. I think we often interfere to our own detriment and it would be in our best interests to apply a non-interference directive.

I'm not saying we should go out of our way to set them up by say, remove warning labels from poison. A true and dedicated moron will always find a potential method of removing themselves from the gene pool and they don't read warning labels anyway.

If however, you do notice an idiot drinking from a bottle of poison, or an idiot changing a light bulb while standing on an office swivel chair, or an idiot removing ear wax with an electric drill, do yourself a favour, quietly excuse yourself from the room and let nature take its course.

As I've realized, trying to be a hero doesn't bring you any more recognition or accolades in this day in age... you're usually just stuck doing the work the idiots couldn't do... while they watch. If you have to do their work, it's better to not have them around at all.



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